Have you ever found yourself thinking something like
“I will do that when………..”
I know I have, many times.
I often hear clients say something very similar. Sadly their ‘when’ is often attached to conditions of worth about their appearance, for example “I will go to the gym when I have lost some weight” or “I’ll buy the new dress when I’ve dropped a dress size”
I believe there are two really important things to see in our ‘I’ll do it when’ responses.
Firstly, why do we have to change anything before we do something we want? We are giving ourselves an innocent but perhaps not very loving message that it’s not ok to do something just as we are. We are saying we have to be different to have or do that thing we want. In that, there’s a silent message that says something like you’re not acceptable or enough or deserving as you are.
And you most certainly are enough just as you are. In fact, you are more than enough.
Imagine if you could see that; if you could see that nothing about you has to change for you to love and be loved and to live a life of fulfilment.
If we buy the dress now, or go to the gym when we want, that won’t mean we stop striving or hoping for change, but it can help us see that in any moment we are enough, even without the things we strive for.
Secondly, I want to offer a gentle reminder that now is the only time we have. It’s the only space we can take action in. The past is gone, and the future hasn’t arrived, and has no guarantee. NOW is the time you have to buy the dress, go to the gym, swim in the sea, spend the day in your pyjamas……whatever it is you have been putting off.
I’m very excited to be getting married in December this year. I had no intention of waiting when Brian proposed. I love him and I want to be married. Of course we could wait until I’m thinner, or my hair is longer, or dresses come down in price, or I don’t have a big spot in my chin! Or we can see that love and life is just about being who and how we are in every moment, not who and how we could be.
So, my message to you is instead of doing it when, do it anyway!
With November love